What people get wrong about anger
Anger, like a sore spot on our body, is important in showing us where we feel hurt and alerting us to unresolved grief. However, it can become a problem if we allow our anger to go unchecked and let it overwhelm us. According to up-and-coming mental health guru Emanuel Perdis, there are five key areas where people often fail with regards to understanding and managing their anger.
Not knowing what triggers us. Being ignorant of our triggers will make us succumb to our anger more often, and more intensely.
Not knowing what risks factors affect our anger. These could include tiredness, sleeplessness, or pressures from work or home. Risk factors essentially raise our metaphorical blood temperature, so that we’re more sensitive and susceptible to stronger emotions, until we reach a near boiling point where it doesn’t take much to reach an angry state.
It’s never about the detail. We often think that the details or the principle of the argument or event that is making us angry in that moment is what sets us off. However, most often, the present situation has actually triggered a flood of memory and hurt from past situations or traumas, resulting in a blown fuse.
Not paying attention to our body’s warning system. We can often beat anger to the punch by noticing and understanding the warning signs that the emotion sends throughout our body, helping us to get ahead of it.
Thinking that breathing is baloney. Over the last ten to fifteen years, we’ve learned a lot more about how breathing affects our nervous system, and our emotions in turn. From sadness to anger and even fear, breathing techniques have known to quickly stabilise and remedy the sensations and feelings of that emotion, effectively combating rising anger.